35

About a month ago during a few extremely stressful days, I would find myself making mental retreats to a very specific moment in time when all my worries were subdued.

I had perched myself upon the precipice of the oceanside cliffs where great, marvelous waves kept jumping up to throw themselves against the rocks, the residue sometimes splattering onto my slowly-sunburning skin. Ahead of me was the vast ocean, a feast for the eyes that had been cramped by houses and man-made barriers for far too long. My bare feet steadied themselves as I leaned a little more forwards to watch some crabs scuttle along, ebbing and flowing with the waves that would seem to knock them off, yet I pleasantly discovered that they held tight the entire time, and were always there after the wave had subsided. 

Basking in the ethereal bliss of sunshine, water, and mountainside (three of my favorite things), I became completely oblivious to the fact that I had wandered a little far away from the shore, where the others were. I suddenly had the sense of someone watching me though, and swiftly shifted my gaze to see who it was. Sitting amongst the tall, yellow grass was my boyfriend, simply observing from afar. I smiled, a little giddy from the height at which I stood and the risks I'd taken to find such a beautiful perch. 

"Ven acá," I shouted over the crashing wave, "Come here!"  

He got up from his place of vigilance and stepped cautiously along the path that I let myself run upon, without inhibitions. I grabbed his hand and chuckled, for being a daredevil type of guy, he's quite reserved when my own life is involved. We walked away from the edge that I had been peering over and sat down upon the warm stones about 10 feet away from the precipice, taking in the entire view together. 

A text message notifcation bings or someone calls my name: I'm instantly zapped back to reality and the stress hormones urge their way up into my throat, weighing down my diaphragm, all of it making it hard to breathe.

I think: How I long to be back there, where the saltwater opened up my airway and the sunshine decreased the tension throughout every single muscle fiber of my body. 

Where we sat near the edge. 

But not too close. 

My frequent travels, however, have made me realize two things: 

Firstly: There is no such thing as running out of adventures. So while it's hard sometimes to imagine the things in store (because only God knows those thing), it is always a comfort to me to know that I can trust in God's wisdom for placing me every.single.place. Including here. Including home + school + work. Not only in the fun places. 

Secondly: There is a certain art in going from those places of absolute tranquility and descending into the everyday stress. Not simply to go through a cycle of peace-stress-peace-stress, but to find a balance, to find a rhythm in which you accept the reality and yet take it with a grain of beach sand, knowing that there is also a reality that surpasses understanding, that being the reality that Christ is with you, gives you strength, and shoulders your burdens with you. 

All that being said, I greatly look forward to school being done and over with. 

And in just 35 more days, it will be.